TRUMP THIS!!

Saw on the news the other morning that Donald Trump is buying a building that sits on property that’s protected by the New York State Park system. He’s going to keep the building intact but plans to upfit it so that it will be a 40-some million dollar restaurant when he’s through.

So far, so good. Except that the Donald has designed a 24-foot TRUMP sign to put on its face, and the sellers are crying foul because they say that’s not in the contract.

Mr. Trump might know a thing or two about business. But I don’t give him props on marketing. Can’t he see he needs to borrow a page from Nike’s book and come up with his own Swoosh?

He should just adopt a bronze casting of a male member as his trademark and be done with it. Isn’t this really what all his gargantuan posturing is all about? He could slap that bronze monkey on the front of all his buildings and, presto, instant recognition. I’m still a little miffed that “the Donald’s” parents didn’t christen him Richard so we could legitimately call him “the Dick.”

Millions of folks are impressed by this real estate magnate, but there are still a few of us schmucks who realize that, just like us, he eats his cake one piece at a time. Hey, speaking of cake

. . .

Cake Comments:

“Who needs a little blue pill to get excited when you can have a Small But Tall?” wonder some.

“This cake trumps any dessert I’ve had lately,” claim others.

“It’s been too gosh schlong since I’ve had one of these cakes,” chortled one fan.

Cake Facts:

One cake will feed approximately 15 hunks or at least 12 studs.